On Friday Maya's Dadima & Grandpa looked after her for the day, and I went to pick up Ahmed from the San Diego airport. On the way, I stopped at our lawyer Aida's office to wait for a phone call from Maya's birth mother (BM), in an attempt to convince her to ratify her signature (the one tiny, essential, final detail needed to complete our adoption) in the next week or so.
Unsuccessful, as firstly, BM was unable to call me, and Aida had to give the awful news that BM would not be able to ratify her signature for likely another couple of months, due to circumstances in her life that are totally beyond of any of our control.
I flipped out. This has become a scarily frequent occurrence, and I now have unpleasant memories of numerous times when I've sat in cars, offices, rooms sobbing uncontrollably. And swearing. I don't like swearing, but help, the words seem to bubble up on their own! Keep getting these comments from people about how 'strong' I am. Afraid not, am feeling incredibly weak and tired and unable to cope with the indefiniteness of this. Anyhow, apparently BM is going to be able to call Aida's office again on Monday at 2pm, so I'll have a chance to speak to her then, and somehow, who knows how? manage to convince her to ratify her signature in the next week or so. And it's not as simple as just convincing her to do it. So many external factors that are influencing her at the moment, unfortunately. Will have to pick my way very carefully through our conversation. I'm feeling quite scared that I'm not up to the task, and my Spanish isn't strong enough for this kind of pressure!
Picked up Ahmed from San Diego airport again with stinky news. Feels like a pattern, as the same happened in December when he came last time. He's becoming such a pro at the Secondary Inspection he gets every time he enters the USA, that the guy at New York airport 'inspecting' him recognized him from the time he was our 'inspector' in San Diego many months ago.
It is wonderful to have Ahmed back in Tijuana again. Though once again, we have all this uncertainty hanging over us, and BM not being available to ratify her signature for several more months is a very real and scary prospect. We've had to work out a variety of different scenarios for the outcome of tomorrow's phone call.
And to finish on a happy note, here's Maya in her cute hat knitted by her Dadima, busy with her favourite occupation, chewing on stuff:
Ah, this funny year, so desperate, scary, drawn-out, painful, frustrating, financially ruinous, and yet there's this amazingly positive constant throughout: Maya and her fascinating development and hilarious antics. No pleasure without pain.
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