Phone call from BM, part II

Maya's BM didn't call today either. Now Aida has said she'd go in tomorrow to another judge's office, to work something out, regarding the BM. So we'll sit tight till tomorrow.

Phone call from BM

Maya's BM didn't call today at 2pm, as promised. We sat in Aida's office and waited. I was all ready with my most convincing speech, that would definitely get her to agree to ratify now, this week or next, rather than in a couple of months, which is the other option. Tomorrow evening she'll call us, we're told.

Scary news sandwiched in between some cute photos

Let's start out with a lovely picture of our beautiful girl, happy as a flea on her papa's knee in her gorgeous duds, courtesy of Celia:



On Friday Maya's Dadima & Grandpa looked after her for the day, and I went to pick up Ahmed from the San Diego airport. On the way, I stopped at our lawyer Aida's office to wait for a phone call from Maya's birth mother (BM), in an attempt to convince her to ratify her signature (the one tiny, essential, final detail needed to complete our adoption) in the next week or so.

Unsuccessful, as firstly, BM was unable to call me, and Aida had to give the awful news that BM would not be able to ratify her signature for likely another couple of months, due to circumstances in her life that are totally beyond of any of our control.

I flipped out. This has become a scarily frequent occurrence, and I now have unpleasant memories of numerous times when I've sat in cars, offices, rooms sobbing uncontrollably. And swearing. I don't like swearing, but help, the words seem to bubble up on their own! Keep getting these comments from people about how 'strong' I am. Afraid not, am feeling incredibly weak and tired and unable to cope with the indefiniteness of this. Anyhow, apparently BM is going to be able to call Aida's office again on Monday at 2pm, so I'll have a chance to speak to her then, and somehow, who knows how? manage to convince her to ratify her signature in the next week or so. And it's not as simple as just convincing her to do it. So many external factors that are influencing her at the moment, unfortunately. Will have to pick my way very carefully through our conversation. I'm feeling quite scared that I'm not up to the task, and my Spanish isn't strong enough for this kind of pressure!

Picked up Ahmed from San Diego airport again with stinky news. Feels like a pattern, as the same happened in December when he came last time. He's becoming such a pro at the Secondary Inspection he gets every time he enters the USA, that the guy at New York airport 'inspecting' him recognized him from the time he was our 'inspector' in San Diego many months ago.

It is wonderful to have Ahmed back in Tijuana again. Though once again, we have all this uncertainty hanging over us, and BM not being available to ratify her signature for several more months is a very real and scary prospect. We've had to work out a variety of different scenarios for the outcome of tomorrow's phone call.

And to finish on a happy note, here's Maya in her cute hat knitted by her Dadima, busy with her favourite occupation, chewing on stuff:



Ah, this funny year, so desperate, scary, drawn-out, painful, frustrating, financially ruinous, and yet there's this amazingly positive constant throughout: Maya and her fascinating development and hilarious antics. No pleasure without pain.

Playtime at the Snot Farm

Everybody in our little world has been sick for some part of the past month, with a series of rather stinky colds making rounds. Nobody living in our house or next door has been spared, and various names for our situation have been put forth. Snots 'R' Us, the snot factory, the snot farm, our little snot monsters (the babies), snotlets, snotsters. Yes, it's gross, but snot has featured largely in our lives lately, and Maya's blown the most impressive snot bubbles. None captured on film, unfortunately. She's not at all impressed by the snot sucker ('nasal aspirator' in more refined circles, but snot sucker is a more apt description of its function, I feel), though it does help clear her up for a bottle or a feed. I guess all the playtime with her friends Yara, Clifford & Margot has helped to spread the bugs, but it's inevitable that colds will be passed around, and what fun is it to hang out in isolation anyway? Here's some of the fun:

Beginnings & Endings. Actually Just Endings

I said goodbye to Anna and Yara today. Tomorrow they are flying to Mexico City, then Amsterdam, then Moscow, then Omsk, to visit Anna's family there for the next two and a half months. They're off to the minus 20 degree temperatures! Maya and I will definitely miss them and, given that it would be unimaginable that we are still here when they get back on the 31st March, I don't know when we will next see each other.



Anna has not only been a wonderful friend, but she was also our witness for the court process, so played that important role in Maya's adoption. And without her I'd have been lost when Pepi's car got towed away. In fact without her, I'd have been generally lost and extremely bored. Thank you Anna!!

Another 'ending' this week was volunteering at the Red Cross thrift store. Since June last year, Maya and I have spent our Thursday mornings sorting through donations, putting them out in the shop, tidying up shelves and in Maya's case, chewing on the clothes hangers & charming all the other lovely volunteers there. Not sure if I can say the same for myself, though of course I did my best!! It's so much easier when you weigh 9kg and have the world's cutest grin. Despite weighing about the same as my carry on luggage usually does (!), Maya is getting just a bit too big to lug about in the front pack for two hours straight. Maya's also now in level 3 at Gymboree (who'd ever have thought?), and that's on Thursday at 11am. I will definitely miss the Red Cross as well. Lovely & quirky Oscar, Julia, Dawn, Efren, Lucia, Tom, Frances and Helga.


Here's a sight for Playas that I'm sure caused a few double takes: Three (obviously foreign) women and their four (quite Mexican) babies trundling down the street in their various strollers/buggies/pushchairs. We're having gorgeous weather these days, and it's a crime to stay indoors.

Trifles

Yes, courts opened in Mexico on Monday, 12th January. That 'magic' day came and went, and another day after it. Nothing is happening, yet again.

We are now waiting upon an unknown person, who needs to go and meet two other unknown people, to resolve an unknown case, before Maya's birth mother will be in any state to sign off our adoption. All feels very bitsy and out of our realm of influence.

So once again, we're left here focusing on the minutiae of everyday life: Pink or white tights with the burgandy dress? Does the spoon make a difference with how much dinner Maya eats? Does she really not like broccoli, or is she just tired? Where is the warmest spot in the house to get the bread dough to rise? Where oh where did the Tui Bee Balme disappear to? These and other trifling thoughts occupy my mind all day long, while the REALLY BIG issue just hovers around behind those thoughts. When my mind wanders from the everyday, trifling matters for a moment, and the REALLY BIG issue drifts in, I get too scared, and have to go back to wondering whether I need to buy more cleaning products.

Ice, ice, baby

On New Year's Eve, Maya's Dadima and Grandpa arrived in Tijuana for a much-anticipated three week visit. Ironically, they've arrived from sub zero Toronto, with snow up to their knees, into Tijuana, temps in the low teens, and not a snowflake on the horizon, but my, it's so much colder here. Because, of course, those hardy Canadians have it figured out. Their houses are geared up for the cold, and they're all toasty warm during their indoorsy winters. Meanwhile, the cold of Tijuana doesn't really warrant super-insulated, state-of-the-art centrally heated houses, so we shiver our way through the cold months, huddling around feeble gas heaters and wearing far too many pairs of socks.



With all this hard work battling the cold, our bodies have succumbed to bugs, and Dadima, Maya, Clifford, Margot (the twins from next door) and I have all had an array of colds, running noses, sneezing, coughing, sore throats, and eye infections.

Despite all this, Maya is delighting in the company of her grandparents, and keeping us all entertained with her new antics. She's a barrel of new tricks these days, and in the past month or so, she's started clapping, waving hello and goodbye, putting things in boxes or bags and pulling them out again, pushing all the chairs (and anything else she thinks might prove a decent object to hold her up) around the living room, wiggling her bum in time to clapping or music, repeating sounds, and (just) standing up on her own, unsupported, for a few seconds. A definite precursor to walking, but we're trying to put her off that particular 'trick' till papa comes back to Tijuana next week. She's exploring everything she can get her little hands on, and finds the following objects infinitely fun: gas bottles, water bottles, tissue packets, the paper bag full of plastic bags, the kitchen cupboards, the kitchen stools, the dining chairs, her shoes, my shoes, my hairbrush, remote controls, cellphones, keys. She's our wee explorer, and is happiest 'trawling' about looking for action.